My Release

I had been in the hospital a month & it was time for me to go mainly cuz my insurance wouldn’t allow me to be there any longer. And I never told anyone about the black woman I saw in the rear view mirror or the music in my head. But I was feeling pretty good. Mark & I saw each other quite a few times on the outside & we had sex which I could have done without that, but like it or not we did.


My coworker found a little cottage for me to live in. My mom paid for 1st, last, & security deposit. I loved my little place. Margaret helped me move in. And my mom stayed with me the first night. It was so hard coming out of the hospital into the real world. In the hospital everything is so secure & structured & the real world is so cruel or can be. I remember going into K-Mart & I smiled at this man & he did not smile back, I was devastated, it almost killed me, cuz I was not used to that.

I went back to work & back to mowing lawns & it was all so great. My life was fantastic, I felt great & I was happy. I was seeing the therapist Joan & a Psychiatrist Dr. Edwards, he was a little skinny short man, very cool. But I missed Dr. Roberts, cuz he reminded me of my 5th grade teacher, whom I adored.

Like I said thing were going good at work, I even got a raise. Then about a year later things started going down hill.